Monday, July 26, 2010

The windy wind blows ferociously


Today the wind just wouldn't stop. I am reminded of how big of an obstacle this really is especially when riding with a pack on your back. If I were a sailor, I wouldn't be too upset, but I'm not. I'm a cyclist.


Returning to the flatlands was hard enough, but returning to the wind made it just annoying. I'll take a 3000 foot climb over a stiff headwind any day.


Friday, July 23, 2010

Yipee!


This is what it feels like at the top of a mountain.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

My wife is great


It's hard to find someone that you can have so much fun with, but I've found her. It's great. She comes and plays with me when she can and humors me whenever I want to do something crazy. As long as it's not too dangerous. She's awesome.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Colorado is awesome





Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Unleashing the climber within


It turns out that deep down inside of me there is this crazy dude who is half human, half mountain goat, half peregrine falcon and 100% freak. He's not very big, maybe 5' 7" and 110 lbs, but he likes going uphill and then flying down. For a flatlander from MN like myself it's a surprising revelation.

Over the past three days I have probably climbed more vertical feet on my bicycle than are in almost all of the routes that I ride in Minnesota combined. My favorite of which was the Rist Canyon ride. If you get the chance to do it ever, it's worth the trip.

The funny thing is that I'm not the skeleton skinny climber like Andy Schleck or Alberto Contador, but it's just rewarding to climb. It doesn't matter if there is anyone with you or if you go fast or slow. Getting to the top is always the same prize every time for every rider regardless of the time it takes. Especially when you start climbing real mountains. It's so much fun! I know it's a bit masochistic, but it's hard to beat the feeling you get when you are at the top of a big hill and can look back at where you've come from.

Or when you get there and can look forward to the ride down...


Monday, July 19, 2010

Today, I did this!



Woohoo!




Even though I prefer road riding, mountain bikes are definitely worth riding when you have the chance.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Sometimes it's hard to eat enough.

Yeah, that's right. No one is going to want to hear me say this but sometimes it's hard to eat enough. Especially when you have to eat 4000-5000 calories in one day. Okay, so maybe it's not really super difficult to eat that much considering how many ways our US cuisine has invented for us to overindulge, but eating well and eating that much is a serious challenge. After all, food is fuel, and if you want to run like a Ferrari and not like a Yugo you have to use premium, you know? Now try eating almost double that while 4-6 hours of your day are spent riding your bike across the country.


Some of the riders at the Tour share telemetric information with the media just for fun. Jens Voigt is frequently one of those riders. He often shares his real time heart rate, power output and speed so that they can show the data while airing the Tour. It's cool, but humbling when you see that he's just cruising along around 30 MPH with a heart rate in the low 130's. In addition, two days ago, Jens was working like a madman to get Andy Schleck in Yellow and reported to journalists that he burned 6000 calories during his ride up and over the Col de la Madeleine. That's only in one day. Doing work like that, riders sometimes have to eat as much as 9000 calories per day. Yikes!



I found this article last year by Joel Stein about trying to eat that much. Here it is for your reading pleasure. In the meantime, while I prepare for my day in the mountains tomorrow I think I'm going to have a snack...



"What's Tougher, Riding or Eating" by Joel Stein

As much as I'd like to experience the Tour de France, I don't enjoy being on a bike for more than 90 minutes or going uphill. So after years of longing as an obsessive fan, I came up with another, more American way to experience the thrill of the Tour.

I would eat everything the riders do.

After all, as impressive as riding 125 miles up the Pyrenees in five hours is, eating 9,000 calories in a day is far better. And it's a goal that, through training, determination and possibly vomiting, I figured I could attain.

So I called Team Columbia and asked for its menu from one of the hardest days of the 2008 Tour, which included the insane climbs up Col du Tourmalet and Hautacam. Looking at the six meals -- the caloric equivalent of nearly five days of food for a normal adult male -- was the gastronomical equivalent of staring up at a cloud-covered mountain as you approached it (or what I assume it would feel like to stare up at a cloud-covered mountain as you approached it). Apparently these guys needed so many calories that day that Team Columbia's professional nutritionist required them to drink two Coca-Colas. I kept rechecking the list to make sure there were no Twinkies on it.

I soon decided that if I were to be true to myself and my American heritage, I'd have to attempt this feat while sitting on my couch, watching live cycling coverage. It would be all calories in and no calories out -- at least not through sweating. (Unless I was sweating over a toilet bowl.)
Also, in camaraderie with the Tour, which is trying to eliminate performance-enhancing drugs, I vowed not to smoke any marijuana.

TEAM COLUMBIA MENU

STAGE 17, TOUR DE FRANCE 2008

Breakfast
• Banana (1)
• Muesli (150 gr)
• Pasta (150 gr -- weight is non-cooked)
• Croissant with chocolate (1)
• Coffee (250 ml)
• Soy milk (300 gr)
• Mixed fruits (200 gr)
• Orange juice (300 ml)

Pre-race
• Pasta (150 gr)
• Water (500 ml)

Race
• PowerBar (4)
• Fruit cake (100 gr)
• PowerBar carbo drink (4000 ml)
• PowerBar energy gels (4)
• Coca-Cola (400 ml)
• Turkey sandwich (2)
• Water (1000 ml)

Post-race
• Recovery drink (500 ml)
• Turkey sandwich (1)
• PowerBar (1)
• Coca-Cola (330 ml)
• Fruit cake (100 gr)
• Water (400 ml)

Dinner
• Mixed vegetables (200 gr)
• Pasta (200 gr)
• Chicken breast (250 gr)
• Sauce (100 gr)
• Plain yogurt (350 gr)
• Mixed fruits (150 gr)
• Water (800 ml)

Pre-sleep
• Gum/sweets (100 gr)
• Chocolate (25 gr)
• Water (500 ml)

Before any record-shattering athletic feat is attempted, it's always best to check with a medical professional. My longtime doctor, Robert Samuelson, gave it some thought and concluded, "It would not hurt you at all" and "You'll gain weight." He also said it wouldn't be much different than eating a couple of Big Macs in a day. Let me just say that while Dr. Samuelson is a great doctor and a smart guy, he clearly knows very little about the McDonald's menu. I would have to eat 17 Big Macs to equal the Team Columbia daily caloric intake.

On the morning of my attempt, I woke up extra early just to start eating, which felt rather weird. Unfortunately, it took me almost an hour to prepare breakfast, so I didn't actually start consuming food until about 9 a.m., putting me behind schedule from the start. In front of me, I saw what looked like one of those expensive hotel Sunday brunch buffets that includes breakfast, lunch, dessert and a meal not yet invented.

I enjoyed the fruit, and a half-pound of pasta with olive oil is never a bad thing. But I do not know what the Swiss do all day that requires muesli to be the densest food ever made in non-bar form. The only way I could get through my bowl of it was to revive myself occasionally with little bites of the chocolate croissant.

I felt so full afterward, I broke my own rule and went out for a walk, which turned into a hike. Even Tour riders don't cheat during breakfast.

Before the race starts, there is another meal -- for which I was not yet hungry at all, having eaten an hour ealier. I plowed through the other half of the box of pasta and downed it all with two pitchers of bright pink PowerBar carbo drink, which made me imagine a summer camp for kids who are too skinny. But halfway through I broke down, sweating, with stomach pains. I have no idea how you can eat this much and then feel like getting on a bike. Or how you can eat this much when you're nervous about racing. Or how you can eat this much if you're an adult elephant.

As I watched the race on TV, I alternated between two turkey sandwiches, four peanut butter PowerBars, four PowerBar energy gels and two Cokes. I looked at the riders' grimacing faces and knew I was suffering more. As I sipped my second Coke, my eyes started watering and I desperately wanted to barf. But then, thankfully, the race ended. I was a whole lot of carbo drink, one PowerBar, three gels and a piece of fruit cake behind schedule. Cadel Evans, who'd won the day's race, was smiling and talking on TV, not enduring anything close to what I was. I kept wondering what would happen if those two women on the podium with him tried to kiss me. It could be ugly.

An hour later, as I sat down for my postrace meal, I'd recovered impressively -- I downed another turkey sandwich, my fourth PowerBar of the day and another Coke. The PowerBar made my jaw ache, but mostly, I was just dealing with the clich├ęd self-recriminations of an athlete after a loss. I could have dealt with the jaw fatigue and had another PowerBar, but I held off. I vowed to make up for it later that night.

I had to head out to a movie screening in the early evening, but I took my predinner snacks with me. I was gnawing on a giant piece of fruit cake 30 minutes into the film when, suddenly, my face turned red and I felt feverish, as if that last little bit of food had activated all the other food still inside me. I made it about 10 feet out of the theater before I saw that I was following none other than Larry King into the men's room. And I immediately felt very, very bad for him.
I'll spare you the gory details on that portion of the evening. Suffice it to say I went to the bathroom six times that day. I'm not a scientist, and this was not a real experiment, but I learned at least one thing from all of this: You give the human body enough calories in a short enough period of time, and it doesn't have time to turn it all into fat. One way or another, those calories get turned to waste.

I also learned I'm an idiot who does idiotic things.

At 11 p.m., with just an hour to go, I stared at the uncooked chicken breast, vegetables, fruit, yogurt, chocolate and (unbelievably) more pasta I had left to tackle -- and I dropped out. I fell short by more than 2,000 calories. And I marveled, more than ever, about how different I am from professional athletes.

I guess I will never know what it's like, on any level, to be a Tour de France rider. Which fills me with the kind of shame only known by people who fail in an attempt to do something stupid that no one cares about.

The shame of Robbie Knievel.

The philanthropist and humanitarian Joel Stein is based in Los Angeles and a Time magazine columnist.

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

YES!



The only thing sweeter would be if big brother Frank was still in it. However, even with his untimely demise, I'm happy to see Andy in Yellow. Although, it is a long ways out from Paris still. We'll see if he can hold on to it.
I do have to admit that I am a bit disappointed to see Evans crumble the way that he did, but that's going to happen when you are trying to race the Tour de France with a broken arm...


My favorite part yesterday, though, was listening to Andy's post race interview. Sometimes I can't believe how dumb the questions are that sportscasters ask and Andy just took it in stride and told it like it was. The guy interviewing him asked if Andy was testing Alberto on the climb and why he was attacking so much. Andy simply said "To drop Contador. I was not testing, if I had attacked one more time I would have dropped myself."


Duh! Take that sports reporter. No more questions like "you just won a stage in the biggest bike race in history, are you excited?" Really, who gave these guys a microphone?
An uneventful day today means Andy is still in Yellow and it looks like the race will come down to a mano a mano slugfest between Schleck and Contador in the Pyranees. Woohoo!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Good luck and Bad

Sunday's stage in the Tour de France gave a leap in standings for guys like Andy Schleck and Cadel Evans, but looks like it spelled the end of the Tour for "Lance Factor." It's hard to come back into a race after crashing once at a bad time, but three bad crashes was just too much for even a hardened veteran like Armstrong. When all was said and done he was down over 12 minutes from the lead. It may not be impossible to come back from (considering the amazing flips in leadership during the Giro this year), but I would have to say it's unlikely. Even in his prime, Lance would have had difficulty making up that kind of time.

On the other hand, the day made for a stunning display of climbing prowess as Andy Schleck powered to the line for an impressive victory.




And who isn't happy to see Cadel Evans in Yellow? I for one am very glad to see him have the success that he has had this year after making his move to BMC. We'll see how he does from here on out.


With a couple more stages in the Alps before heading south and west there are sure to be some more fireworks before the big showdown in the Pyranees. I can't wait!

Monday, July 12, 2010

My First Taste of Superweek

Last Saturday, I got my first taste of the Point Premium Root Beer International Cycling Classic and Superweek Pro Tour (affectionately known as Superweek). I found myself in Illinois visiting the in-laws for the 4th of July and since my wife and I are now jobless vagabonds until we move to the Milwaukee area for me to start medical school I figured we may stick around through the following weekend so that I could race while we were in town.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Superweek, it is in its 42nd year of providing high quality bicycle racing for the Milwaukee area and northern Illinois. It has been raced by up and coming pros whose names you might recognize like George Hincapie, Lance Armstrong and Tyler Farrar to name a few. So when I knew I'd be around to try my luck I couldn't pass up the chance.

The race I was in was the Mill Race Cyclery Classic in downtown Geneva, IL. Downtown Geneva is a cool little town surrounded by neighborhood with a feel like Stillwater, MN (but thankfully without "the wall" that Stillwater uses in their Nature Valley Grand Prix stage).




On race day I arrived in plenty of time to warm up and rode 8 or 9 laps of the course to get a feel for it. Turn 3 at the corner of 5th and South Streets was especially treacherous because the corner was scattered with patched pavement over a couple of water main covers and banked away from the corner. Not only that but the road narrowed from a typical residential street to a single lane. Had the pavement been in better shape, it wouldn't have been too big of an issue but as it was all the riders were eyeing it carefully and picking the best lines to try and avoid any trouble.

As I lined up to start at the intersection of 3rd and Franklin I found myself in a field of 75 Cat 4/5 riders ready to push it to the limit for every one of our 25 laps. At this point in my racing career I always expect criteriums to start off at a high pace, and this race was no exception. With the draw of great racing, a wide range of riders were in the pack from first timers to the top club riders from around the area (or even out of town). I anticipated the high starting speed and did well in the pack, but as we finished 5 laps I was still too far towards the back of the pack and having to pick my way through riders who were falling off and trying to close the gaps they were leaving. I found another rider who looked as strong or stronger than me in the same situation and hopped on his wheel. He closed a few gaps for me but began to feel the pressure as well and I was on my own again trying to chew through the peloton. After 10 laps like this I was starting to wonder if I could keep this up. Still 15 laps to go and no sign of slowing. Thankfully it was just then that the field began to need a little recovery and I found myself in mid-pack able to get some water.

Then we were off again. Somewhere around this point a rider in front of me went down in the second to last corner after a flat. Thankfully, his momentum took him to the outside of the turn and the rest of us were unaffected. Around 10 laps to go I was hurting again, but knew that I could make it to the end. Two laps later after a rider in front of me tossed his chain going through the treacherous corner I was slowly fading of the back. The rider had been just a few riders in front of me on the narrow section of one lane road. It wouldn't have been too much of a problem except for that those of us behind him had to slow down before making the turn around corner 4 and going up 6th street and going up 6th street really means going up. The hill wasn't too steep but it was significant enough that it was the place to make a move or be dropped if you weren't ready. I don't know how many of us fell off at that point, but I wasn't the only one. I fought as hard as I could to close the gap, but by the end of the lap I knew I'd likely be finishing alone.

However, as luck would have it, I didn't have to finish on my own. With 6 laps to go 5 other riders pulled up alongside me just before making the final turn south onto 3rd st and told me to hop on and share the work. I sat through as the front two riders pulled and had enough recovery to do my share. We worked together for the next few laps and could see that we were slowly making up distance on the peloton. With 4 laps to go we saw them go around the bend to the right at 6th and Campbell and hope began welling up in me. We rounded the corner and were suprised to see a pile of 15 or so riders in the middle of the straight on the right side of the road. I'm not really sure what happened, but suddenly I though "we could be back in this." I moved to the front and did a long pull before trading with the rider behind me. With only 2 more laps our little group had been whittled down to just three of us.

I led our grupetto through the start/finish on the last lap planning to make a move at Turn 5 after letting another rider pull me up the hill. It worked perfectly and I opened a big gap on Campbell street. Just to make sure it would work I jumped hard one more time as I came onto the home stretch and powered home. It was good enough to beat my breakaway buddies and I then slowed to congratulate them on the good work we did together and on making the most of what had looked like it was a futile effort. In the end it was good enough for 19th. There were only 40 finishers from the starting 75. My average speed when all was said and done was around 26 MPH. A hard day indeed!

It was a pleasant surprise to jump up at least 10 places after the crash and to not have been a part of it. I'm sure I was being watched over because had I stayed with the peloton I would have certainly been in a dangerous place at the point of the accident (seeing as I was toasted enough to only have been riding on the back of the group). Even better than finishing in one piece was to have the support from my family there to cheer me on. My 3 year old twin nephews were there shouting their encouragement every time I passed and apparently were very interested in the race. Good to know that I have a couple of early converts already.

Later that night we came back to watch the men's pro race. 73 laps and 100K later 5 riders had lapped the field and three of them made another break to fight it out in a 3 way sprint finish. What a race. I didn't even really think it was possible to do that... This was only day 2 of the 16 day Superweek tour so I'm sure there are many more impressive feats to come.

Superweek, unfortunately, is in danger in Illinois. They have met a lot of resistance from the towns and vendors where their races are held which means the schedule frequently changes from year to year and at the last minute. Because of that, this race was thrown together on short notice. However, it did not affect the quality in the least and I think once all was said and done, the community was thrilled to have had Superweek visit. Hopefully the race is back again next year. Hat's off to Mill Race Cyclery for holding an excellent race on a great course.

Friday, July 9, 2010

'Nuff Said


I think the tag says enough.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

In the US, Criterium is King

As I get myself ready for racing on Saturday I can't help think about the uniqueness of criterium racing and its predominance here in the US. Personally my bent is more towards road races than the criterium. In a road race you generally have a better sense of where the members of the field are, there is more space to maneuver on the road and a breakaway actually stands a chance of surviving. A criterium on the other hand just feels like all out chaos. I said once that racing in a crit feels like being part of a school of barracudas the way we flow on the road and dart around corners almost like we are chasing down prey and I still feel that way.



However, there is a strange serenity that comes in racing a criterium as well. In between the ebb and flow of power surges and the struggle for position in the peloton there are quiet moments too when the world seems oddly in order. You can hear yourself breathe for a split second between all out efforts or the world is suddenly silent except for the buzz of freewheels. All of these moments metered out by the furious beating of your heart are squeezed into tiny gaps between riders' attempts to push themselves to the limit.



Regardless of the criterium's reputation for being a crash-fest and the intense demands that come with this kind of riding, I find these sparse gems of peace scattered throughout it all to be rewarding and kind of beautiful. Perhaps criterium isn't king after all, but rather an opiate of the masses. The fast food of bicycle racing that all of us can enjoy. One that all of us riders can partake in and feel the rush that is bicycle racing even if we can't climb over mountains or ride repeatedly for days or even weeks.



Hopefully, I'll still feel this way after I race this weekend.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

All Hail the Domestique

Domestique is a french word for servant. Initially it was used in cycling as an insult for the first rider to offer his services to assist another rider. Back when there were not teams and cycling was a brutal display of individual endurance, tenacity and determination. Now those elements have not left the sport, but the battlefield has changed as teammates try to assist one another in their goals.

Domestiques are the coolest guys in the peloton as far as I'm concerned. Everyone loves to cheer for a superhero like Lance Armstrong or Alberto Contador, but what they don't understand is the help they are getting from their teammates and domestiques. Some of these "behind the scenes" guys are so good at helping their team leaders that they have even earned the title of "super-domestique." Jens Voigt, George Hincapie, Levi Leipheimer are a few examples to name a few. All of them are accomplished cyclists in their own right, but what makes them greatest and most valuable in a race like the Tour is there ability to watch out for their team leaders.

I saw an awesome example of this by Team Saxo Bank two days ago when there was crashing and carnage like none other during stage 2 of the Tour de France. The whole day, the Saxo Bank boys had been riding close to the front chasing a breakaway to try and keep their man Fabian Cancellera in the yellow jersey. Suddenly on the descent of the very last hill all hell broke loose and riders started going down all over the place. The road narrowed and it had been raining hard for almost half and hour. Riders just couldn't keep their wheels under them in the slippery conditions and then gravity took it from there.

One of my favorite riders, Andy Schleck, was included in this crash along with many other very good riders. I was afraid that he would be out of contention for the overall and maybe even out of the race altogether by the way he looked. After looking stunned for a few moments though, another teammate came over and gave him his bike, none other than Matti Breschel the former Danish national champion. Then Jens Voigt dropped back from the lead group to help and Frank Schleck who had also crashed (Andy's older brother and current Luxembourg National Champion) both did their best to get Andy back to the front since he is Saxo Bank's team leader.



Talk about selflessness. It's just stinking awesome. No two ways about it.

So the next time you decide to sit down and watch a bike race look for the guys in front doing all the work and say an extra hurrah for them. Without those riders to help, the guys standing on the podium at the end of three weeks might not have ever made it.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Grand Tour + First Week = Crash Fest


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! Sadly this is what today's stage of the tour ended like. After a stellar ride and overall win at the Tour de Suisse, Frank Schleck is out of the Tour de France. He will be sorely missed in the mountains when Andy needs his help, but it may not be the curtain call for Andy and his Saxo Bank team as they have already shown by mostly riding in complete control for the past 3 days. Unfortunately, today disaster struck.
I don't know what it is about the Grand Tours thus far this year, but it seems that no one is safe in the first handful of days. Maybe starting in Holland is just bad luck, but with only three days behind us now there are way too many riders out of the race. At least 5 teams have lost riders and time will only tell who is ready to start tomorrow morning.
Hopefully the next few days will see fewer riders laying on the ground.

Monday, July 5, 2010

Flexibility, the underestimated superpower

As I was sitting stretching I was thinking about how underrated flexibility really is. Even by the time I was in high school lots of my friends had trouble touching their toes, me included. That's kind of sad.For some reason, nobody seems to care too much about being flexible. They want to be fast and strong and jump high or be able to lift a car. Maybe it's because you can't usually see how flexible someone is that no one cares if they are. But it's time to put that ridiculosity aside and acknowledge how important it is to stay bendable.

As a cyclist and generally athletically inclined person flexibility is important to me for lots of reasons. For one, it means that I can comfortable move my body in the ways it needs to move on a bike, in the pool while swimming or just playing frisbee. Ultimately, I think that greater flexibility offers greater recovery. I can't say that I have cold hard proof of this, but I know that when I work on my flexibility it is easier for me to push my body day after day than when I neglect it.

As a college volleyball player we often played in a tournament style where each Saturday tournament would mean between 3 and 5 or more matches. I neglected my flexibility thinking that I was young and it didn't matter too much, but it often meant that I limped around campus for a day or more wishing that I had taken more time to stretch myself. However, during the summers while I ran triathlons, I often spent 10-15 minutes stretching after I finished swimming and running each day. With this routine I stayed limber and had an easier time cranking out training days one after another.

While flexibility may come easily for some and be more difficult for others it is worth everyone's time pursuing it. New research last fall indicated that there is a correlation between peoples flexibility and their chances of coronary artery disease and heart attack. While this is not necessarily a cause and effect situation there is no proof yet that it's not. Just one more reason for working a little harder to touch your toes.

Whether you try yoga--which can be pretty hard by the way, but well worth it--pilates, ballet, tai chi or just spending a few extra minutes in your day making sure that you're not too stiff the results will be satisfying.





See how happy it makes you?

Friday, July 2, 2010

In the spirit of celebrating our independence day, here's a little something to make you smile. I know it's a couple days early, but I'm pretty much a Mon-Fri type of blogster. Also, I thought I'd take this opportunity to begin a new trend: Funnyface Fridays where the weird and wild can truly flow freely and fancy free. (aching all over after all those alliterations?)

Now please sit back and enjoy.




It's actually amazingly more impressive if you watch even just a short bit of the original.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Le Tour is Looming


Only 2 more days until Le Tour de France begins! I can hardly wait. My wife just rolls her eyes every time she sees me start to get giddy about the event, but it's so close, that I really don't care(she was giving me the same eye roll a month ago when I was following the live feed ticker for the Giro at 5am in the morning).


With the Tour so close the grand depart only a breath away, there are many questions about this year's parcours. The European national championships have mostly come to a close and riders are resting after testing periods at Dauphine and the Tour de Suisse. The list this year is long for podium contenders including Bradley Wiggins, Lance Armstrong, Christian Van De Velde, Alberto Contador, Andy Schleck, Frank Schleck, Ivan Basso and Cadel Evans to name a few. There is a veritable slew of competitors this year vying for the top spot, but only time will tell (three weeks to be exact) who comes out on top.

While Armstrong has confirmed that this will be his last tour (again) other riders seem poised to start a true tour legacy...cough cough...ahemandyschleckcoughhack...cough. Excuse me.

Regardless of who dons the maillot jaune come the end of the Tour, this race promises to be an exciting one with plenty of competitive individuals and teams.

Of course, what would be a tour without the affable and ofttimes laughable Jens Voigt. To get you in the spirit take a gander at a few of these sample facts about Jens.

  • When Jens Voigt rides off the front of a peloton, he’s not actually riding faster, he’s pulling the earth closer towards him.
  • Jens Voigt rides so fast during attacks, that he could circle the globe, hold his own wheel, and ride in his own draft. At least as long as he didn’t try to drop himself.
  • If by some incredible space-time paradox Jens could ever race himself, he would win
  • Jens no longer has a shadow because he dropped it repeatedly until it climbed into the Saxo Bank team car claiming a stomach ailment and retired.
  • Jens does not feel pain. Pain feels Jens.

If you can't get enough here, stop by Cyclingtips for more.